social freakin’ media


Is it the devil? Is it the best investigation tool? Is it a waste of time? What is it REALLY?

For me, I’ll admit – I’m insta obsessed. I love going online, looking at photos of fitness, clothes, food, hair, beaches, anything really. I think a person can tell a lot by what they follow on social media. It shows what you’re into, your passion, your thoughts – it can tell a big story.

One if the BIGGEST turn offs for me, is when I am dating a guy and he follows only girls on Instagram, twitter or whatever. Half naked chicks and what not. It’s gross and again, a huge turn off. That’s me personally. If a guy follows all fitness instagrams – chances are he’s into fitness. If a guy follows only sports – chances are he’s into sports. Get it? Not that hard…

Anyway, a girlfriend of mine recently started dating a guy (I guess about a month and a half ago) and naturally at some point they will become facebook friends. It’s a part of dating that we have to take into consideration. Welcome to 2015.

How far does a guy creep? Let’s be honest, a girl – well…she’s going to know what your 2nd cousin in Washington looks like, what your mom’s maiden name is and what grandma Wilma looks like, all 3 of your longest relationships – the girls name, what school she went to and what you looked like with baby fat on your face in 2008. A girl will know. She’ll find out. She will also know who your best friend is and who his girlfriend is.

I guess I should go ahead with a disclaimer and say not every girl is like this and it also depends on how much the girl is into the guy. Okay?

But, the question my girlfriend asked me was – how far to guys go? What do they look for? Do they go as in-depth as a girl does? My first reaction is probably not but then I got to thinking to myself Whiskey knew shit about me I didn’t even know myself. Not really but he did admit he stalked me and that he stalked hard. He also admitted when we weren’t talking frequently he would go on my facebook and look at what I was doing and my photos. A few weeks ago I had commented on a friends status that I was going to be in Chicago in a couple of weeks and Whiskey said “I deleted my Facebook but before I did – I saw you commented that you will be in Chicago in a couple of weeks, for what?”. Another guy I started dating a couple of months ago (name is Mr. K for the blog..) knew quite a bit about me and on our first date he was asking me questions and I was asking him questions and I asked if he had any dogs… his exact response was “Uh yeah, it’s my facebook profile pic, me and him, did you not stalk me?”.. uh no, I actually didn’t. Which I really didn’t. I don’t know why but I didn’t. For me, the more I like a guy as time passes that’s when I do my investigation. Hahaha #realtalk

My ex, “Jake”, told me after we broke up he went on my facebook and creeped the new guy I was dating. He also creeped his ex after me, her new guy. The burning question is this. How far do they go?

I asked a few of my guy friends, what do you look for? Here’s what they said. Oh, and they might not friend you but they will find you…

  • “I creep a little – mostly on the ‘about’ section and photos.” (He also met a girl recently and found her on facebook but didn’t add her.) – Anthony, 33
  • “I’m not a digger of one’s past. So I can’t speak from all guys. The more I know about a chicks past the more likely I am to find something that turns me off”. – Chad, 28
  • “Bikini pics… and what other dudes they hang around. Oh and exes. That’s a big one.” – Will, 29
  • “ I personally look at pictures first, then go through information on her to sense what kind of person she is and lastly see if she has a man.” – City, 31

So after talking to a few guys, I would say girls look for more details and create a story in their head and guys look more at the surface level. Hot body, her selfies, how hot she is etc..

I have a friend who found a guy on Instagram, knew who is ex was, also found his good friend and his girlfriend and knew that he cheated on her and they broke up in January. (I think I got this right? She reads this blog and will remain anonymous but I mean, hello. Investigation skills on point.) hahaha don’t be mad at me 😉 muah But girls do. We put together the pieces and we build a story in our minds of what we assume happened.

100% of us have stalked to some capacity. I was 26 weeks deep into a exes Instagram and accidently liked a photo. I quickly unliked that one and went to the most recent one and liked it instead to hopefully make it look like I only liked that one. #genius? I mean, I thought so at the time. And you can FORGET letting your mom see the photos. My mama is notorious for trying to zoom in on Instagram. YOU CAN NOT.. Tap tap… alrightly looks like we liked that photo.

So if you were wondering what guys look for vs girls. Now ya know.

happy stalking.. 🙂


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